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Spanky's Movie Review's

Updated: 2018-03-05T19:34:45.921-05:00


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We Bought A Zoo


Spanks - 5

Director - Cameron Crowe

Writers - Aline Brosh McKenna and Cameron Crowe

Starring - Matt Damon, Scarlett Johansson, Thomas Haden Church, Colin Ford and Maggie Elizabeth Jones

Release Date - 23 December 2011

MPAA Rating - PG

We Bought A Zoo is very loosely based on the book of the same name by the owner of the Dartmoor Zoological Park in England Benjamin Mee. Mee bought the struggling zoo with his entire family in 2006. The film takes place in Southern California and the Benjamin Mee played by Matt Damon quits his job a few months after his wife dies and wants to move to start over. He finds the perfect house that he wants to buy, but then is told that the property is a zoo that is being run by the state. Mee is a writer and has no idea how to work with animals and run the zoo.

The movie follows a lot of the traditional Hollywood formula, but it is done well. A good part of the movie is the struggle between Benjamin and his son who wanted to say with his friends in the city. The film is more about the family while the book is about the animals and the zoo.

We Built A Zoo is a good movie to take the whole family. It has some good laughs and it has some heartfelt moments scattered throughout also. It is a holiday movie worth seeing.

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The Muppets


Spanks - 4

Director - James Bobin

Writers - Jason Segel & Nicholas Stoller

Starring - Jason Segel, Amy Adams, Chris Cooper, Kermit and the rest of the Muppets

Release Date - 23 November 2011

MPAA Rating - PG

The Muppets are back! It is their first big screen appearance since Muppets From Space in 1999. In the new movie, The Muppets have all moved on with their lives and Muppet Studios is falling apart. Muppet fans Gary and Walter are on a trip to Los Angeles and while on the studio tour Walter overhears oil tycoon Tex Richman trying to buy the land out from under The Muppets because of the oil located underneath. Walter tells Gary what he heard and they find Kermit to tell him and try to convince him to get the gang together to save the studio.

The film is surprising not a reboot of the series (a thing Hollywood does more and more of now). The writers did a good job of trying to update The Muppets while keeping the feel of the old movies and show when Jim Henson was in charge. It could have used more of the old style of Muppet Jokes.

If you enjoyed The Muppets when you were younger, you will continue to enjoy them with this movie.

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Bonus video from a few years ago because it is awesome!
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A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas


Spanks - 4

Director - Todd Strauss-Schulson

Writers - Jon Hurwitz & Hayden Schlossberg

Starring - John Cho, Kal Penn, Thomas Lennon, Amir Blumenfeld, and Neil Patrick Harris

Release Date - 4 November 2011

MPAA Rating - R

A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas is the best adult Christmas movie ever made (editors note: as far as I know it is the only adult Christmas movie). The film follows the format of the previous Harold & Kumar movies with the heroes on another adventure. This time, they are not looking for a fast food restaurant or clearing their names as terrorist, the duo are in search of the perfect Christmas tree to replace the one that they caught on fire and are being chased by the Russian mob.

The same hijinks occurs with this adventure. They smoke weed, make weed jokes, make dirty jokes with the only difference is the 3D aspect. They make jokes about the 3D and use it way more then necessary at times I think to make fun of the unnecessary use of 3D in Hollywood post Avatar.

Neil Patrick Harris continues to spoof himself as the woman loving drug addict that he played before. His few scenes are one of the funniest parts of the film. A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas is a hysterical movie that is just simple fun and I hope everyone sticks around for at least one more adventure.

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Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides


Spanks - 4

Director - Rob Marshall

Writers - Ted Elliott & Terry Rossio

Starring - Johnny Depp, Penélope Cruz, Geoffrey Rush, Ian McShane & Kevin McNally

Release Date - 29 April 2011

MPAA Rating - PG-13

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is the fourth chapter of the series and is loosely based on Tim Powers novel On Stranger Tides. In the film, Jack Sparrow is now searching for the Fountain of Youth. Captain Barbossa who is under orders from King George II, the Spanish, and Edward "Blackbeard" Teach are on the hunt for the fountain as well.

After the previous two sequels, I did not have my hopes that high that it would get better. On Stranger Tides, is better then both Dead Man's Chest and At Worlds End. They didn't milk all the jokes from Curse of the Black Pearl like they did in the first two sequels either. The only mentions of those other movies in the plot is Barbossa, The Black Pearl and Jack the Monkey, if you did not see any of the other films you can jump into the fun of this one and not be lost. There are a few Easter eggs for the long time fans.

The film goes back to what made the original so good. It is funny, full of swashbuckling action, complex characters you can love, hate or both and (best of all) pirates!

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Spanks - 4

Director - Kenneth Branagh

Writers - Ashley Miller & Zack Stentz and Don Payne

Starring - Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Tom Hiddleston, Anthony Hopkins, Stellan Skarsgård, Kat Dennings and Clark Gregg

Release Date - 6 May 2011

MPAA Rating - PG-13

Thor is the first of two films released by Marvel Studios this summer. It is the origin story of the superhero Thor. It begins on Thor's home world of Asgard and tells why he came to Earth and how he became one of the heroes of Earth. It also introduces Jane Foster and how she got thrown into Thor's life.

The movie has some really good action scenes with Thor kicking ass. Kat Dennings does a great job as the comic relief playing Jane Foster's intern. The people who designed and created Asgard did a fantastic job "building" that world.

If you are a fan of comic book character movies, you will enjoy this film. I am looking forward to a possible confrontation between Thor and Iron Man in next summers Avengers film.

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Fast Five


Spanks - 4

Director - Justin Lin

Writers - Ben Ripley

Starring - Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Dwayne Johnson, Jordana Brewster, Elsa Pataky, Tyrese Gibson and Chris 'Ludacris' Bridges

Release Date - 29 April 2011

MPAA Rating - PG-13

There are only two words to describe Fast Five. Absolutely ridiculous. In a movie based in reality, the main characters are more invincible then superman and physics are thrown out the window of a Ford GT40. The film is hilarious too, but I am not sure it was written to be funny. One example; in the opening sequence, Vin Diesel's character is broken out of the prison bus by having it flip over end over end (multiple times) using a sports car while both are driving at high speeds. Everyone on the bus survives and there is not a scratch on the sports car. The screenwriters also wrote a screenplay full of plot holes. If they needed something to happen to fit their story it just did without logic or explanation.

After Dom is freed from going to prison by Brian and Mia, the trio escape to Rio de Janeiro. Once there Dom decides they should do one last job to be set for life. To pull if off they bring in everyone who has helped Dom and Brian in the previous four movies. The DEA send special agent Hobbs and his team to apprehend Dom and his gang and crime lord Hernan Reyes don't make the heist easier.

Despite everything wrong with Fast Five, the film is entertaining, only because of the ridiculousness. It is not an award winning film except for maybe an MTV Movie Award. If you have a crappy rainy afternoon, this could be a good two hour escape for you.

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Source Code


Spanks - 5

Director - Duncan Jones

Writers - Ben Ripley

Starring - Jake Gyllenhaal, Michelle Monaghan, Vera Farmiga and Jeffrey Wright

Release Date - 1 April 2011

MPAA Rating - PG-13

Source Code is one of the only films not based on an existing character or story that has been released this year or due out this summer. It is about a secret program called The Source Code that can send a person back in time for the last eight minutes of a persons life. This can be done as many times as needed, reliving the same 8 minutes. The intent of the program is to go back and stop disasters and terrorist attacks. In this situation, a bomb goes off on a commuter train in Chicago. Air Force Captain Colter Stevens is tasked to go back an locate the bomb and find out who built it.

Throughout the whole film, I was trying to predict what would happen next, and each time I tried I was incorrect (also hoping I could use The Source Code to go back and see what I missed to get it right). You would also think a movie that takes place over the same eight minutes over and over would get boring and get predictable, but it never does. It is one of the best movies of 2011 so far.

Source Code is the movie you want to see this summer instead of another remake, or sequel, or comic book movie, or reboot, or based on that bestselling novel by that person because all but one tent-pole movie is one of these.

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Spanks - 4

Director - Greg Mottola

Writers - Nick Frost, Simon Pegg

Starring - Nick Frost, Simon Pegg, Jason Bateman, Kristen Wiig, Blythe Danner, Joe Lo Truglio and Seth Rogen

Release Date - 18 March 2011

MPAA Rating - PG-13

Paul is the first movie Simon Pegg and Nick Frost have starred in together without Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz director buddy Edgar Wright. It is almost as good and as funny as those two films. Paul is about two British sci-fi geeks who, after San Diego Comic Con, go on a road trip of UFO hot spots around western United States. Everything is going according to plan until they run into Paul. Paul is an escaped alien from Area 51 who crash landed on Earth and just wants to get back home.

The laughs start off a little slow, but once all the characters are properly introduced, the laughs are nonstop. I am not a huge fan of Seth Rogen, but he does an awesome job as the voice of Paul (who was created using CGI). The movie has its share of fart jokes, but there are plenty of more intelligent jokes... and who doesn't like fart jokes.

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Battle: Los Angeles


Spanks - 4

Director - Jonathan Liebesman

Writers - Christopher Bertolini

Starring - Aaron Eckhart, Michelle Rodriguez, Ramon Rodriguez and Bridget Moynahan

Release Date - 11 March 2011

MPAA Rating - PG-13

I went into Battle: Los Angeles expecting things blowing up, cheesy dialog, aliens, and gun fights and that is it. That is exactly what I got and there is not anything wrong with that. The film follows Sgt. Nantz, a US Marine whose retirement is approved the morning of a strange worldwide meteor shower. It turns out it isn't a meteor shower, it is an invasion. His retirement is overturned and he is assigned to the 2nd Battalion 5th Marines under 2nd Lieutenant Martinez who is fresh out of the academy. Their orders are to rescue survivors located inside "the hot zone" and return in three hours before the Air Force bombs the area.

The film is an alien invasion version of Black Hawk Down. After about twenty minutes of character introductions, it is an hour and a half battle filled with explosions, destruction, chaos and mayhem. The film is shot in the same style as well.

Battle: Los Angeles is a summer popcorn flick. If you want a movie with substance and award winning writing this is not the film for you. If you want a fun filled movie with with quotes like "I am only qualified to work on animals and aliens" said by a veterinarian then head to the box office straight away.

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The Adjustment Bureau


Spanks - 4

Director - George Nolfi

Writers - George Nolfi

Starring - Matt Damon, Emily Blunt, Anthony Mackie, John Slattery, and Terence Stamp

Release Date - 4 March 2011

MPAA Rating - PG-13

The Adjustment Bureau is loosely based of off the Philip K. Dick short story "Adjustment Team". The film follows Senator David Norris and his accidental run in with the Adjustment Bureau, a mysterious organization that keeps individuals from deviating from "the plan". David meeting Elise was not a part of "the plan", and David is determined to beat the Adjustment Bureau so he can be with Elise.

The film is part thriller, part romantic, and part science fiction. It uses all three together well. It does start off a little slow, but about half way through it picks up once you start to learn the mythology of this world. It takes a couple of turns that you don't expect to keep you on your toes. The Adjustment Bureau is not the best movie ever made based on a Dick story, but it is no where near the worst.

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The Mechanic


Spanks - 3

Director - Simon West

Writers - Richard Wenk and Lewis John Carlino

Starring - Jason Statham, Ben Foster, Tony Goldwyn and Donald Sutherland

Release Date - 28 January 2011

MPAA Rating - R

The Mechanic is the latest action film starring Jason Statham. I just found out, after seeing the film, that it is a remake of a 1972 film starring Charles Bronson. The film is about a hit man named Arthur who after a hit on his good friend Harry, must fight back against the company he works for who made the hit on Harry. Arthur takes Harry's son Steve as an apprentice after the death of his father.

From watching the trailers before seeing The Machanic, I expected the film to be a no holds bar adrenaline thrill ride like Jason Statham's other action movies like The Transporter and Crank. It does not compare. There is only two action sequences including the climax of the film. The climax that is so quick that if you blink you can miss it. The story is nothing original, and I got bored a few times waiting to see what I came to see...gun fights and stuff blowing up.

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True Grit


Spanks - 4

Director - Joel Coen & Ethan Coen

Writers - Joel Coen & Ethan Coen

Starring - Jeff Bridges, Hailee Steinfeld, Matt Damon, Josh Brolin and Barry Pepper

Release Date - 22 December 10

MPAA Rating - PG-13

True Grit is a western based on the book by Charles Portis and is also a remake of the 1969 film starring John Wayne, but follows the book more closely. The film follows teenager Mattie Ross, who goes to Fort Smith Arkansas to pick up her fathers body after he was murdered by Tom Chaney. Disobeying her mother, she sets out to personally hire a US Marshall to hunt down Tom Chaney to bring him to justice. She chooses Rooster Cogburn because she is told by the town's sheriff that he has "true grit".

The film is very much more a period specific then a lot of recent westerns in that it uses a lot of dialog that they would use in the 1870's. Mattie uses some words that I have never heard before because they are words that every day Americans don't use anymore. Hailee Steinfeld, the actor who plays Mattie, is a very talented young woman who should be a big star in the next few years.

The Coen Brothers have made an excellent film. The acting by all three stars is brilliant. Who would ever think The Dude would win Oscars 12 years later. And how did they get Matt Damon to grow that mustache?

If you are not a fan of westerns, you don't have to worry about not liking the movie. My girlfriend never wants to watch westerns with me, and she loved True Grit even more then me.

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Black Swan


Spanks - 4

Director - Darren Aronofsky

Writers - Mark Heyman and Andres Heinz and John J. McLaughlin

Starring - Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, Vincent Cassel, Barbara Hershey, and Winona Ryder

Release Date - 3 December 2010

MPAA Rating - R

I went into seeing Black Swan expecting a bizarre movie with a Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis sex scene. What I got was an excellent and bizarre movie that also makes you think, with a Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis sex scene. Black Swan follows a young ballerina named Nina who is up for her big break starring as the lead in "Black Swan" after the retirement of the groups' star. Nina befriends Lily, the new girl in the company. Lily also wants the lead role but is awarded the job as Nina's understudy. The pressure, hard work, and fame gets to Nina which makes her go through a transformation of her own.

The movie has a lot of sex throughout, which could make some people uncomfortable, and it can be debated if it was needed for plot development or not. Even though it is about ballet dancers(which I have no interest in going to see), Aronofsky made a film that keeps your attention from start to finish.

The camera work for the ballet scenes are incredible. The director of photography and camera operator made the camera another dancer to put you right in the middle of the action. Clint Mansell's music fits perfectly and was one of my favorite parts of the movie.

Black Swan was made very well and the actresses do deserve the award nominations that are being predicted. I also wouldn't be surprised it the film got a nomination for best picture.

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Spanks - 1

Director - George Tillman Jr.

Writers - Tony Gayton, Joe Gayton

Starring - Dwayne Johnson, Billy Bob Thornton, Carla Gugino, Tom Berenger

Release Date - 24 November 2010

MPAA Rating - R

Faster is the first Dwayne Johnson action movie in six years. He should stick to comedy and children's movies if he is going to make action films like this one. In Faster, his character is jailed for robbery for ten years. Now that he is free, his only goal is to get revenge and kill everyone who was involved in the robbery that had him put in prison and his brother murdered. Billy Bob Thornton plays a drug addicted detective that is a week from retirement. There is a hitman that the bad guys hire to kill Dwayne Johnson's character. I guess killing him in prison would have been too easy.

The film is unoriginal and extremely predictable. There wasn't any part in the 98 minutes run time that I was surprised by what happened. They didn't do anything groundbreaking or original in the cinematography. It is a very generic movie.

If you want a good revenge movie just watch any of the Transporter films, Kill Bill or Taken instead.

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Spanks - 4

Director - Robert Schwentke

Writers - Jon Hoeber & Erich Hoeber

Starring - Bruce Willis, Mary-Louise Parker, Karl Urban, Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich & Helen Mirren

Release Date - 15 October 2010

MPAA Rating - PG-13

RED is the latest action comedy that is based on the DC comic of the same name. The film follows Frank Moses who is a retired CIA agent. One night his home is attacked by a group of assassins. He escapes and with the help of a group of retired CIA agents, and the girl he likes, he finds out the conspiracy he was dragged into and sets out to clear his name.

RED is an extremely funny movie. You will be laughing through out the entire film. John Malkovich's character Marvin makes you laugh the whole time he is on screen. This is definitely the film to see to just laugh your ass off.

The only down side of the film is it is very predictable. It follows a very generic action movie formula, but since the movie is meant to be funny this is easy to overlook.

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Scott Pilgrim vs. the World


Spanks - 5

Director - Edgar Wright

Writers - Michael Bacall & Edgar Wright

Starring - Michael Cera, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Ellen Wong, Mark Webber, , Johnny Simmons and Ben Lewis

Release Date - 13 August 2010

MPAA Rating - PG-13

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World is an underrated movie. I know in the two weeks since it came out it has not been the blockbuster Universal had hoped, but this is a movie that you should see. It has something for everyone and is the perfect date movie; it has comedy, romance, action, lesbians love, epic battles, and breakups.

The film follows 23 year old Scott Pilgrim as he searches for his true love. He figures he found it in Ramona Flowers. Quickly, Scott finds out that he must defeat her "seven evil exes" in order to be with her.

The movie has lots of pop culture and 80's video game references hidden throughout to add to the laughs, but if you miss them you won't be lost in the plot. The only problem I had with the movie was that Michael Cera gets annoying and whinny at a few points throughout.

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Spanks - 5

Director - Christopher Nolan

Writers - Christopher Nolan

Starring - Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page, Tom Hardy, Ken Watanabe, Dileep Rao & Cillian Murphy

Release Date - 16 July 2010

MPAA Rating - PG-13

Christopher Nolan makes another awesome film with Inception. His first original film since Following. This film, like all of Nolan’s but The Dark Knight, is a not told in a straight linear fashion. It takes place throughout a series of dreams. Cobb, played by Leonardo Dicaprio, and his team use some made up technology that enables him to go into a person’s dreams to steal information. After a job goes sour, he is offered a job he can not refuse. This job requires Cobb to implant an idea into the subject's mind and not to steal something, which is believed to be impossible.

The movie does some really cool things visually that I can’t recall ever being done before. It is done so well that it doesn’t look fake like most effects in movies these days. It is really cool once you know why these things are happening in the story.

The story is the most original done in a long time. It isn’t based on a book, a TV show, a movie that was made 20 years ago, a comic book, or a video game. It is the only film this summer that isn’t based on something already made in some medium.

Inception is visually worth seeing in a theater, but you will have some questions that will make you want to walk back to the box office and buy another ticket so you can catch the answers the second time.

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Toy Story 3


Spanks - 5

Director - Lee Unkrich

Writer - Michael Arndt

Voices - Tom Hanks, Tim Allen, Joan Cusack, Ned Beatty, Don Rickles, Michael Keaton, Wallace Shawn & John Ratzenberger

Release Date - 18 June 2010

MPAA Rating - G

Even though Pixar pretty much made traditional animated films extinct, they are probably the most creative group of people in Hollywood. Every movie they make is brilliant in every way. Toy Story 3 completes the story started 15 years ago at the genesis of computer animated films in Toy Story. We all grew up with these characters. In the first film, Andy was a little kid with a wild imagination who loved playing with his toys. Now, in 2010, Andy is grown up and is about to leave home for is first year at college and has not played with Woody, Buzz, and the gang in years. While cleaning is room, the toys were supposed to go in the attic, but accidentally end up at the Sunnyside day care center. Since Woody loves Andy unconditionally, he has to get the gang back to Andy since they aren’t supposed to be at the day care center.

Watching this movie, you see how far the technology has come over the years. The detail put into everything has gotten 100 times better. I would have never thought cartoons would look this good. It still will never replace traditional animation, but that is a whole other topic.

The movie is full of laughs, I laughed the whole time. The story was well thought out and it is the perfect ending for the series. I wont give anything away about the last reel, but it is a very happy heartfelt ending and if you don't feel some kind of emotion before the credits roll you must be some sort of robot.

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Spanks - 5

Director - Nimród Antal

Writers - Alex Litvak & Michael Finch

Starring - Adrien Brody, Topher Grace, Alice Braga, Walton Goggins, Oleg Taktarov, Laurence Fishburne, Danny Trejo, Louis Ozawa Changchien & Mahershalalhashbaz Ali

Release Date - 9 July 2010

MPAA Rating - R

Predators is based on a story Robert Rodriguez wrote way back in 1994, but 20th Century Fox wouldn't produce it. Fast forward about 15 years, Fox decides to produce the film. Predators is the best movie starring the Predator since the original 1987 film with Arnold Schwarzenegger. The film takes the franchise back to its roots, something it lost in the two Alien Vs. Predator films. The film starts with Adrien Brody's character waking up in a free fall. His parachute opens and he lands safely in the jungle. He meets other military personnel, criminals and gangsters from around the world. The movie solves why the "greatest killers" are kidnapped and put together in this jungle.

The film pays its tributes to the original in many ways throughout, and never done in a way that it doesn't move the movie forward. Most importantly, the Predators were men in old school rubber monster suits and not crappy modern CGI, which would have ruined the whole thing. The composer even uses the original music themes and styles. You could watch the two films back to back and they would fit together as if the same people made both.

Since the film is a big hunt, it gets violent at time, but it isn't the gory variety. It wasn't easy to predict the order of deaths, I was wrong every time. If you enjoyed the original Predator films then you will enjoy and have a great time with Predators. And the one liners, are awesome!

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The A-Team


Spanks - 3

Director - Joe Carnahan

Writers - Joe Carnahan & Brian Bloom and Skip Woods

Starring - Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, Jessica Biel, Quinton 'Rampage' Jackson, Sharlto Copley & Patrick Wilson

Release Date - 11 June 2010

MPAA Rating - PG-13

The A-Team is the absolutely ridiculously fun action movie of the summer of 2010. The plot is unoriginal. The action is beyond unbelievable. It has some big names in the cast. It is funny. It is full of cheesy dialog.

Like the television show the film is based on, it follows a special army unit who are arrested for a "crime they didn't commit". The show (from what I remember) they break out of prison then become mercenaries and every episode they help people who have a problem and no one else can help. The film is about the unit trying to clear their names after being framed by a private security company called Black Forest.

The best part of the movie is Murdock, played tremendously by Sharlto Copley. He makes the movie. Everything he said or did made me laugh. No one else in the cast is half as good as him.

The plot is predicable and follows the Hollywood formula for popcorn flick about clearing your name. However, with action sequences that involve flying a tank while being attacked by fight jets you have to give the writers some credit for some sort of creativity and originality.

The A-Team is worth a screening from your comfy couch while enjoying the beer (if your over 21) or soda and the chips and salsa that are on your coffee table.

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Iron Man 2


Spanks - 4

Director - Jon Favreau

Writers - Justin Theroux

Starring - Robert Downey Jr., Don Cheadle, Scarlett Johansson, Gwyneth Paltrow, Sam Rockwell, Mickey Rourke, Samuel L. Jackson & Garry Shandling

Release Date - 7 May 2010

MPAA Rating - PG-13

Iron Man 2
is the third movie produced by Marvel Comics based on the universe they created in comic books adapted for the big screen (Thor and Captain America are in production for release next summer). The film takes place about six months after the first film and is about the repercussions of Tony Stark creating and becoming Iron Man. Tony has problems with the US military who want the suits for their soldiers. Problems running his company that is now in the business of peace instead of creating weapons. A poor disgruntled Russian man, Ivan Vanko, who wants to kill Tony because their fathers worked together and his was deported and the Stark’s got rich. And to top it all off, Tony is dying.

Robert Downey Jr. continues to portray Tony Stark perfectly. Mickey Rourke plays such a convincing Russian that you would think he was from Russia and not New York. Don Cheadle fits the role of assistant/sidekick/friend Colonel Rhoades better then Terrance Howard did in the first film. Howard was replaced because of salary issues. Cheadle looks more tough and military like then the former.

The film doesn’t one up itself from the original like some recent sequels like The Dark Knight or X2. I’m not saying it’s a bad movie, just when you compare the two the first is better. The film has less action overall then the first one, but the final action scene verses Whiplash is better then the final battle with Ironmonger. Whiplash was a much more bad ass villain too, and you can never go wrong with adding Scarlett Johansson kicking ass as the Black Widow.

Iron Man 2 is a true summer film, It is full of fun, edge of your seat excitement, things blowing up, beautiful women, laughs, and fighting. All the things needed and wanted in the opening weeks of the summer at the cinema. It is a movie that will not disappoint you.

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Spanks - 5

Director - Matthew Vaughn

Writers - Jane Goldman & Matthew Vaughn

Starring - Aaron Johnson, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Mark Strong, Lyndsy Fonseca, Nicolas Cage & Chloe Grace Moretz

Release Date - 16 April 2010

MPAA Rating - R

Kick-Ass is the first superhero/comic book movie to be released this summer movie season. However, Kick-Ass is not your typical superhero film. Most superhero and/or comic book movies are rated PG-13 or even sometimes PG and Kick-Ass is rated R. Like any superhero movie, it isn't to be taken seriously.

The film is based on comic written by Mark Millar and is set in a world without superheroes. Dave Lizewski, a normal New York City teenager who hangs out reading comic books has always wondered why nobody has ever become a superhero. He makes a costume, makes a MySpace page and sets out to save New Yorkers and calls himself Kick-Ass. When Kick-Ass tries to help his school crush by telling a drug dealer to leave her alone he meets Hit-Girl and watches her kill all the "bad guys" in the apartment, and gets pulled into something way over his head.

There is a lot of controversy going around about the large amount of violence, gore, the bad language and Hit-Girl. Unlike Batman or Iron Man, the violence is not toned down and is very bloody. Every major character "curses like a sailor". The biggest of them all is the character of Hit Girl played by Chloe Grace Moretz. This is because of the language she uses (words like the ones that rhyme with sock and hunt) and the gratuitous violence (guns, knives, swords fights) and body count that her character racks up (I lost count at 6 and that was in Hit-Girls first scene) because she was 13 years old at the world premiere.

If you are not a fan of violence or bad language, this movie is not for you (go see Date Night instead). Controversy aside, since people just love to complain at everything on TV and on the silver screen, the film is funny, entertaining, and action packed. It is everything you can ask for in a superhero movie and Matthew Vaughn has done it better then most. Just remember, as Chloe Grace Moretz said "It's a movie and it’s not real"

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The Wolfman


Spanks - 2

Director - Joe Johnston

Writer - Andrew Kevin Walker and David Self

Starring - Benicio Del Toro, Anthony Hopkins, Emily Blunt, Geraldine Chaplin, and Hugo Weaving

Release Date - 12 February 2010

MPAA Rating - R

The Wolfman is Universal Studios latest remake of their classic monster movie franchises. The film follows English actor Lawrence Talbot who returns home to Blackmoor England, after being sent to the United States when he was younger, after a letter arrives that his brother was missing. After finding his brother's body ripped apart he investigates what killed him. During the investigation he is attacked and bitten in the neck by a wolf, which causes him to change on the full moon.

The film has its highs and lows. Unfortunately, the highs only occur when there is a werewolf on screen. The non-lycan part of the film is very boring, which sadly used more film stock than the werewolf parts. One is not seen until about a half hour into the movie. Once the wolf shows up, it gets violent and sometimes brutal, and many people, some of whom are innocent, are torn to pieces.

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Cop Out


Spanks - 4

Director - Kevin Smith

Writer - Robb Cullen & Mark Cullen

Starring - Bruce Willis, Tracy Morgan, Kevin Pollak, Adam Brody, Guillermo Díaz, Seann William Scott & Ana de la Reguera

Release Date - 26 February 2010

MPAA Rating - R

Cop Out is the latest film from New Jersey native Kevin Smith, and it is his first that he did not write himself. The only connection to Smith's View Askewniverse is that Jason Lee plays a very small roll, so don't expect to see Jay and Silent Bob anywhere.

The film is about two detectives who have been partners for nine years. Paul (Tracy Morgan) thinks his wife is cheating on him and Jimmy (Bruce Willis)has his daughter's wedding coming up. To pay for the wedding Jimmy plans on selling his mint condition 1952 baseball card of Andy Pafko. At the baseball card shop, Dave (Seann William Scott) robs the place, tasers Jimmy and steals his card. Paul and Jimmy use their knowledge from nine years on the force to get back his baseball card and find out if Paul's wife is cheating on him.

Cop Out is the second funniest cop movie of the 2000's behind Hot Fuzz. The theater was full and everyone was laughing from beginning to end. Tracy Morgan is as hysterical as always. Bruce Willis is a funny John McClain. Seann William Scott continues to make me laugh even though Stiffler was annoying and not funny at all.

The plot isn't anything original and great, but it is a fun buddy cop movie. The type that we have not seen since the 80's and early 90's. The score reminded me of the scores from all the classic '80s cop movies, and is scored by the guy who scored Beverly Hills Cop. Go see this movie to just laugh.

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